The Walls

I have lost weight and gained it back and lost it again and gained it back. Never tremendously slender to begin with, and not looking to be a size two, as long as I wasn't a size that was incompatible with my life it wasn't a necessary thing for my piece of mind, my personality, my day to day existence, who I am.

As I prepare to take this on, I am aware that I have issues that might or might not become stumbling blocks as I work my way to this goal. Everybody has them, different for each person, but they are there. For purposes of simplicity, I'll just call them the UGH's! These are mine:

The health issues:

• I have a low thyroid and have been taking meds for that for a couple of years. The low thyroid pretty much equals a low metabolism (Keith says I have a negative metabolism) which doesn't help me burn up what I eat.
• I have been on birth control pills for awhile now, not to prevent pregnancy, but because as I have gotten older, my cycles have gotten harder to handle. The hormones run rampant and a really bad migraine is a sure thing the week my cycle hits; I can easily lose three to four days of my life that week.. So I take the BCP's in a way that I have four cycles a year. It doesn't get rid of the migraines, but it keeps me to about four migraines a year, instead of a migraine every 28 days. And yes, I know that one week BCP's are not responsible for weight gain and the next week they have nothing to do with weight gain, but I'm listing it.
• I have had plantar fasciitis for over twenty years. Three separate bouts of just the most excruciating pain. Appreciate and take care of your feet because life is miserable when they're in pain. I mention this because exercise is really hard when it hurts to stand. I have orthotics in my shoes, can't wear flats for long periods of time, start every day with exercise in bed before one foot even hits the floor, but it's what I have to do. There's a chance it might get significantly better by losing weight, but skinny people have plantar fasciitis, too.

Now for the non-health issues:

• Food! I love to eat! I love to cook! I love to bake! I'm not talking about shoveling food non-stop in my mouth, but I love trying new things and new combinations. There are probably about ten things in this life that I don't like to eat (eel on my sushi, hazelnuts, green beans in any form, chocolate, to name a few). I love veggies, fish, grains, fruit, pasta, salads, cheeseburgers, coffee, steaks, soups, cheesecake, YUM! The Mexican in me stays away from the local Mexican markets, because I can easily come home with carnitas, pan dulce, chicarrones, Mexican Coke (made with cane sugar, not HFCS), posole, bolillos, YUM again! That being said, I don't have half a cheesecake for breakfast. I don't eat two cheeseburgers everyday for lunch. I don't bake every day and therefore have pies and cookies and cake on my counter every day. But I do appreciate food, everything from steel cut oats, to cherry pies, to escargot. Why don't I have fish every day? Well, because...
• ...my family doesn't like it! Among the three members of my family, there are probably a total of six vegetables they'll eat and about a dozen fruits. Eggs and potatoes are OK. Keith grew up as a a meat for dinner with two sides kind-of-guy. Mackenzie's main staple is ketchup. David is getting better about what he eats, but while 16 year old boys will eat just about anything, green vegetables aren't one of them. Without cooking four different meals, this is probably the hardest part of eating consistently healthy for most people and it's definitely one of mine.
• How's your schedule? Mine can be really nutty. It's hard to eat right when you're in a car for three hours going from point A to point F (with B, C, D, and E along the way). I can successfully avoid most fast food places, but there are times when we're fried and we cave. We're human, too.
• Exercise. I don't like to do it. I'm not the quickest or the strongest. I'd rather have another cup of coffee and read the news. But I do it because I know I have to. My goal is to try and change that way of thinking to I want to. With two corgis that need exercise too, I have reason enough to start. Here in Boise, today is the Race to Robie Creek, the hardest half-marathon in the Northwest. Eight miles up and five miles down, it's an ugly race. I know because I have done it. Not in record time, but I have done it and have the shirt to prove it. I'm gonna run/walk it again next year. I'm telling you all now. Two goals in one paragraph, I better pace myself.

So I have more than enough reasons to fail at this. There are probably other things as well, but when I made my list, these are probably the biggest things. If you're playing along with me, it would do you well to make up your own list, have your reasons stare at you in the face so you can stare them back down.